You Don’t Want to Face Job Search Challenges Until You’ve Finished the Grieving Process

The very first thing you must do when you are in a job search is come to terms with the fact that you are in a job search. There is a hugely underrated psychological aspect of being unemployed and looking for a new job.

grieving-man“You are going to have a hard time conducting an effective job search and coming across the way you want to come across in an interview until you have come to grips with your past, with where you were working and how you feel about why you are no longer working there,” according to ExecuNet’s Coach Don Weintraub.

If you’ve been let go from your job there is a huge sense of loss. It’s very much akin to the stages of grieving people go through when they lose a loved one.

People have to work through the 5 Stages of Grieving:

  1. Denial & Isolation
  2. Anger
  3. Bargaining
  4. Depression
  5. Acceptance

It’s not until one has come to terms with their situation are they truly ready for the hard road of a job search and to emotionally project their best self in an interview.

There are many obstacles embedded in the process that require emotional fortitude that one doesn’t have if they are still carrying baggage from a bad break-up. In this process, you get little feedback, plenty of new rejections for no good reasons. Candidates today are shocked to discover that a search today is harder than they realized.

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During their search they uncover questions they don’t know the answers to. Many wonder if their age is going to be an issue in their search; do they have too much/too little experience? Others are concerned that they have been in the same job too long and that could be viewed as a negative, but on the flip side candidates worry they have jumped from job-to-job too much and will be seen as flighty.

There are candidates concerned they don’t have enough education for the role they are applying for, and some who want a role that doesn’t require a Master’s so they fear the employer will think they aren’t seriously interested.

Some candidates are changing careers and are struggling to convince employers in a new industry they can make the leap.

Others are failing to find ways to fill gaps in their resume and understand how to reconstruct work history with measurable business outcomes.

These are just some of the challenges that face job seekers today.

If you are still struggling with your exit from you last job you simply are not going to do a very good job with these enormous challenges.

These are challenges Coach Don has helped thousands of executives work their way through and one thing he has consistently found is that until they have put aside the anger and depression, worked through their grief, they will not be effective job seekers. The search itself is simply difficult enough. If you are bringing your anger, for example, into the process you simply cannot block it from tainting your aura in your interactions.

You may also be interested in: Managing the Roller Coaster of Job Search, a Series

William Flamme

William Flamme

William Flamme is ExecuNet's Marketing Content Manager, where he is responsible for developing engaging career, job search, and leadership insight and delivering executive-level content across the various properties under the ExecuNet brand. Prior to joining ExecuNet in 2008, Will earned a master's degree in education and taught fifth grade and sixth grade. As a teacher, he deepened his appreciation for the written word and mastered skills necessary for managing writers who sometimes view deadlines as homework.

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