Book Review: Getting to Yes with Yourself (and Other Worthy Opponents)

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Thirty years ago, renowned mediator William Ury co-wrote the classic Getting to Yes, which has helped millions of people reach win-win agreements.

But it’s not always easy to get to yes. The biggest obstacle to getting what we really want in business, in our careers and in our lives, Ury has found, isn’t always the difficult person on the other side of the negotiation table. It’s the one in the mirror. The hardest negotiation of all, it turns out, is with ourselves.

Getting to Yes with Yourself (and Other Worthy Opponents) (HarperOne, January 2015) is the sage new book by William Ury, a masterfully crafted guide to improving our decisions, changing our natural tendency to react in ways that don’t serve our true interests, and creating the results we want for ourselves.

Ury offers an elegant, simple (but not easy), six-step method for getting what you really want out of life. The strategies and lessons shared in his approachable book can be used by everyone, every day, in every situation: whether it’s negotiating a raise at work, managing a career change, or developing healthy business and personal relationships.

Ury writes with precision and authority. He is, after all, co-founder of Harvard’s Program on Negotiation, and one of the world’s best-known and most influential experts on the subject. He has taught tens of thousands of corporate executives, labor leaders, diplomats and military officers around the world how to negotiate their way to success.  The book shares examples drawn from Ury’s remarkable career as a consultant and from his personal experience.

Indeed, the real strength of Getting to Yes with Yourself comes from simple and powerful wisdom through personal story. It’s his signature blend of captivating, real-life experiences and sage advice that gives readers the pattern for applying his revolutionary methods to dramatically improve outcomes in all aspects of their own lives.

As businesspeople, we will be more effective by starting within before entering negotiations with others. Apply the strategies on negotiation and mediation contained in this thoughtful and enlightening new book, and you will come out ahead in business and in life.

 

ExecuNet Speaks With the Author

William Ury is the co-author of Getting to Yes, the world’s bestselling negotiation book, and the author of the new book Getting to Yes with Yourself (and Other Worthy Opponents) (HarperOne, January 2015).  In this conversation with ExecuNet Chief Marketing Officer Tony Vlahos, Bill talks about:

  • 0:44  The reason he wrote Getting to Yes with Yourself
  • 2:21  Why getting out of our own way is so difficult
  • 3:26  Why success begins with putting yourself in your own shoes
  • 10:10  How seeing life as your friend makes you more successful
  • 12:01  The power of respecting your opponents “even if”
  • 15:24  Human connection – the secret to successful negotiation
  • 18:08  What business people will gain from Getting to Yes with Yourself

Watch the interview here.



Mark Anderson

Mark Anderson

Mark Anderson is ExecuNet's president and chief economist. An Arjay Miller Scholar, Mark received his MBA from Stanford University and a BA in economics from Yale University. He joined ExecuNet in 1993, with extensive marketing and new product and business development experience, having served as president and founder of A&M Associates, an investment management firm. Mark's corporate leadership experience includes several senior marketing and financial positions with RCA Global Communications (a GE subsidiary) and American Can Company.

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